Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Nervous Wreck.

I woke up late for an interview. I got to the building and I ran like there was no tomorrow for the elevator slowly closing its doors. I barely made it in by sticking my hand through the space in between. I had made it, not quite yet.

Do you ever have those moments where you have a small glimmer of hope that you can make it? catch it in time? Maybe the elevator, the bus, a train ride?

I wasn't actually running towards the elevator for an interview. Nor did I end up going to a building. That was just an image to picture as you read this next part of my post.

I had a talk with my friend just a few days ago and she had shown me the possibilities of achieving my dreams! To live in Korea that is. My hometown, I was removed from Korea at just eighteen months old. My parents brought me to America so that I may learn to speak English.

I always thought I would go back to Korea someday but the thought was always pushed into the back of my mind. Why? To tell you the truth, living in America is much easier and comfortable than high-maintenance Korea. It was just a dream.

I realized, what if this is my calling from God? What if God has planned for me all along and I just kept telling God, "no, I don't want to do it your way". I thought I had given all my decision-making to God already. I guess not.

I talked to my friend on a Saturday night. The following Sunday morning, as I was getting ready for Sunday service, I happened to stumble upon the University of Washington Tacoma's website. Then I bee-lined it towards the transfer requirements and deadlines.

MARCH 15, stood out in big bold letters.

I was given a chance. Here, I thought I would take my time in transferring to a university. I jumped around in four different colleges and led my credits to be a mess. I thought I still needed at least two more quarters before I can fully transfer.

Apparently, not. I could transfer, now. I became so nervous because I did not know if I had been ready to transfer yet!

I knew I did not want to be stuck at a community college forever! I do not feel like this was one of those impulsive and rash decisions I tend to make quite often. I felt somewhat calm yet nervous. I felt that God was in control. As I ran towards the deadline of finishing my application, I had stuck my hand through those imaginary elevator doors and made it in. Any other given moment, I probably would have waited for the next elevator to come.

I somehow made it. I sent my application in today and I do not know whether I will make it to my imaginary interview in time to get accepted. I pray that I will be accepted only if this is what God wants for me. After all, he knows best.

I will be waiting to hear back from the university's admissions.


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