I find it quite
Is that not
My life is currently like the downloading status, rather than 1% ---- 50% ---- to 100% Done, it just drags on as 1% ---- 1.5% ---- 3%---- and so on. No one likes downloading things that take forever, right? But then again our generations have been more impatient as technology becomes quicker.
Currently, working at a restaurant as a server is not a big deal but to me it is. I started waitressing at the age of 18 (not too shabby) and have since worked at probably 5+ different restaurants. In less than a week, I will be 22 years old. Wow, time sure does fly fast (haha, was I not just speaking of time being still?) Anyways, I keep telling myself that this is the last restaurant job I shall ever have- then I shall move onto a job that will advance in my future career.
Psychology is where I am headed as long as God intends so or I will go with whatever other plans He may have for me. I have always been intrigued by the abnormalities of our human selves and what might have possibly gone wrong since the fall of Adam and Eve. That is quite a far while back, is it not? I have a lot of catching up to do, I suppose.
I like to live in a way where everything I do benefits me, others around me, and God. Yet, here I am ... neither benefiting nor helping others. Just as I mentioned, time is standing still. The only thing moving in my life would be money. I work to earn money to pay for bills with money and to feed myself with money, etc. My job is a great paying job with tips coming from here and there but I am not satisfied. Most would be content with working a higher-end sushi restaurant and making $100+ in tips a night but not me. For me, money is not everything. I want to be in a work setting where I can grow spiritually, mentally, and maybe even healthily.
School is another. I have recently been accepted to the University of Washington, Tacoma which will be my first university I will be attending. Before then, I have been in nearly 4+ community colleges/technical college which just felt like running in circles once more.
Do you see where I am getting at now?
I do not want to mope around and say my whole life was pointless because that would be a lie. Everything I have gone through up until now, has been a learning experience and made me who I am today (although I may not be so proud of who I am).
They say the grass is greener on the other side right? Well not too long ago, I was told by a pastor, "The grass is only green on the side you water it". Have I been watering my grass? Or has it withered for 21 years? I think the latter. Or maybe even bits and pieces of my grass is green. I would start watering the grass and give up? Forget? Or simply put, pointless.
I need a change. How many people hear people say that all the time? (uhh.... one too many times). Well I know for a fact, I can sit here and complain about how I want to change my life or I can get up and make a change. Wait, but it isn't that easy... I cannot just drop all my luggage and start fresh... where will I go? What will I wear? What will I eat? I need my luggage to keep me in tact or else... I would be naked.
I have to make smart choices in my change. I have gone through this cycle so many times, "changing" who I am.